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How to Get your Shy Child out of their Shell


Many children are shy. I have 4 boys. 2 are very outgoing. One is very strong willed and has never met anyone he does not consider his friend. On the other hand I have one son who is very reserved. He is the nicest, smartest little man but he does not put himself out there to interact with everyone.  If you look into adult Americans, research has shown that one in two Americans labels themselves as shy. This means being shy is pretty common. While being shy may be common, when you’re raising a shy child you may want to try to help them get out of their shell. If you’re looking for ways to help your shy child out of their shell then you’ve come to the right place. Today I’m sharing some tips on how you can help your shy child be a little more outgoing.

Do Not Hover

You can help your shy child out of their shell without hovering. You see, hovering over your shy child may create a situation where the shyness gets stronger. I am not saying abandon them to the situation. Take a step back and let them spread their wings with the assurance that you are not far away. Shy children tend to be gentler in nature and need a subtle approach to life. You can slowly ease your shy child into a new situation by reassuring them that they’re not alone. Reassure you’ll return and that you are here to support them.

Your shy child will start to come out of their shell in new situations if you remain supportive yet confident that you must step away and allow them the time away from you to learn how to adjust in a new situation. Younger kids can be helped to come out of their shell in a new situation by pretending to be their favorite superhero or similar character before entering a new situation or environment where they’ll be left without their parents. When you learn to be proactive, quick-witted about tricks like the superhero trick and say goodbye without sneaking away from your shy child, they’ll eventually build trust and confidence in being in new environments and situations.

New Activities

While you don’t want to push your shy child into multipleHow to Get your Shy Child out of their Shell  new activities, signing them up for sports or similar activities that interest them will them. Ask your child what they’re interested in. Perhaps they enjoy music, dance or a specific sport. Find a way to get your shy child involved in at least one new activity at a time. In time, your shy child will grow comfortable with this new activity. They will start to feel confident in who they are and how to make their own friends. It’s easy for a shy child to come out of their shell when placed in an environment that offers activities that interest them. This will let your shy child learn to make friends with people who have an interest in the same activities. Sharing interests will encourage a deeper bond than just trying to make friends with random peers.

Remain Patient

As you work to put your shy child into situations that allow them time away from you, you’ll have to find your patience. Shy children will not be ready to let go of their one safety net, their parents. While you want to keep the bond between your shy child and you strong, it’s important that they do learn how to adapt when you’re not around. Keep your expectations at a reasonable level for your shy child. Open the doors to opportunities where they can get out and meet new friends. This will give them the experiences necessary to grow and learn to adapt to new situations without having a panic attack.

Accept Them

My final tip is to accept them for who they are. You can help How to Get your Shy Child out of their Shell  them grow and learn to adapt but they may not ever be outgoing. There is nothing wrong with that. Accept their personality and ensure they know it is ok. They do need to learn to make friends and function without you but only to their comfort level. You can not force a reserved person to be more outgoing. Trying to force a change can add additional stress. 

I hope that these tips will help you get your shy child out of their shell. I know that they’ve worked well for many other families and they will help you in time. Keep working hard, your shy child is who they are and you can’t change them. There is nothing wrong with them being shy. But you can help them to adapt to new situations without causing major stress.

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