As a parent I always ascribe to the motto “it takes a village.” Basically to me that means that raising my children isn’t just what I think is the best. It means using advice and resources from various people. I get some of my best parenting ideas from friends and some of my fellow homeschool moms. Another great resource is parenting books. This allows me to seek advice from someone in a completely different atmosphere than me. They may even parent different or have a different mindset. These differences can be strengths. Recently I had the privlegge of reading a fantastic book called Parenting Through The Eyes of Lollipops.
Jacqueline Pirtle is a holistic practitioner, healing art teacher and mentor, the bestselling author of The 365 Days of Happiness and is a mom herself. She has been featured in multiple online magazines, has appeared on Women Inspired TV, and radio shows, Her article ” Are You Happy?” is in print in The Edge Magazine. She was born in Sweden but currently lives in the USA with her family. She holds multiple international degrees and is a Reiki Master.
You can find out more about her teachings at FreakyHealer, on her podcast The Daily Freak, and on all her social media platforms @freakyhealer
“Through the book Parenting Through The Eyes of Lollipops Jacqueline carries you through the experience of parenthood by making spiritual and energetic sense of real physical-life parenting scenarios—while, as her highest priority, keeping children’s perspectives in mind.
This book opens new doors for you to dive into parenthood with fresh zest, plenty of fun, and infinite love for yourself and for your children by teaching you these 3 important pillars to better parenting:
- The Harmonious Dance
- It’s Never The Child
- The Love Cycle of Parenthood
This profound parent-life wisdom can be utilized immediately, so you too can experience a spectacular time with your children, including teenagers, ASAP.”
You can find Parenting Through The Eyes of Lollipops on Amazon
My Initial Thoughts
Parenting is challenging on its best days. It is rewarding and I would not exchange it for anything but it is challenging. I have 4 boys and each is so different in their own way. I have a 6 yr old son who swears he not only rules the world but everyone else is here to be entertained. My 12 yr old is a introvert and too smart. He thinks in a very analytical manner and is probably more intelligent and more mature than I ever will be. Our 17 yr old is sweet but has a attitude. Our oldest has various things which present their own challenge in themselves but at the end of the day has several good qualities that when he allows them out outshine everything else. It gets interesting adapting to each of them. Our 2 oldest are adopted from about 5 yrs ago so that presented challenges with bonding with 2 almost teenagers and earning their acceptance and trust. That being said you can understand why I say my husband and I parent each child differently.
When I first read the synopsis I was a little leery because it seemed so different to how we parent. With having 2 adopted children and 2 bio children that are all so different I wondered if I would be able to utilize the information that was doing to be presented. I decided I would still read the book with a open mind. In the book the author discusses 3 pillars of parenthood that will enhance the parent and child relationship.
The 3 Pillars
When I was sent this book in exchange for a honest review the title itself made me excited to read it. Lets face it who doesn’t like lollipops. In the book we are presented with 3 different pillars of parenthood. Each pillar helps with a specific way to become a better parent.
- The Harmonious Dance: Reading this made me think about that parenting is like a dance. It can be fun while the parent and child each perform their dance and learn to dance in harmony while allowing the child to become who they need to be. In the book it shows how this Harmonious Dance is a entwined dance between physical and spiritual.
- It’s Never The Child: One sentence that stood out to me in this area is ” Having to make mom and dad feel good is a heavy weight to carry.” To me this basically meant that to a child having to be what your parents says is a heavy responsibility. A child should be allowed to be themselves. Yes there needs to be guidance but not forcing them to be what we as the parent wants so long as it is safe to allow them to choose. This section also helps you look at reasons why a child may misbehaves and realize its not just because they want it there are underlying causes. This really helped me with handling a kiddo with pretty sever behavior issues. I had to step back and think where did he come from, how long was he in foster care, what has happened in his life before he came to our family. I also had to think that while we loved him how did him seeing us with our 2 bio kiddos and knowing that they would never go through what he went through affect him and his feelings of self worth and love. It was eye opening to put it in the perspective that it is not his fault or his wish to be defiant.
- The Love Cycle of Parenthood: With having 2 teenagers and a preteen this pillar really hit home to me This section helps you explore each age and phase of raising your child. It speaks on important growth aspect of love and nourishing yourself and your child.
My Final Opinion
The entire book presented alot of valuable information and provided me with a few different ways to look at parenting. Parenting Through the Eyes of Lollipops encourages equality between parents and children and encourages parents to respect their children and not put too much pressure on them. My husband and I do parent this way to a certain degree. For example I in no way feel my children are beneath me or not equal to me but I do feel that my husband and I make the decisions and that at times while they may not agree with what we are asking they need to respect that we are the adults and have more experience. As they get older they are allowed to make larger decisions on their own and we do our best to support those decisions or be there if it does not work out the way they wanted. We also try not to pressure our children in things that they do not want but I will admit since we homeschool I do have educational expectations.
I loved how the book helps you to shift the focus from being in charge to the realization that you and your child need to work together to ensure a healthy and happy family. My husband and I already try to do this with our children and the book helped provide ideas to do it in a even more efficient manner. All in all I feel the book is a excellent resource to any parent. Even if your parenting style is not the same there are so many ideas that there is something that can be beneficial to anyone.